So, maybe it's time to formally introduce both myself and my other half? Seeing as you'll be hearing all about our lives for the next 9 months, it seems only polite to let you know what you're dealing with...
As you've probably gathered from the obligatory and unsatisfactory 'About me' section, my name is Rachael, and the man jumping on the baby train with me is my partner of two years, Michael.
I am turning twenty next month, and found out only a couple of weeks ago - in some surprise! - that I am around 4-5 weeks pregnant with our first baby. Although it came unexpectedly, myself and Michael are both really very happy at the thought of welcoming our new little life into the world, and I cannot wait to start telling everyone that we're going to be parents! Currently, only immediate family and very close friends know about the pregnancy, and it will stay that way until I reach the relative safety and haven of the 12 week mark. It's partly why I created this blog; so I could have an outlet to vent all my happiness, frustration and worry while I'm still unable to discuss it all publicly, but it's also to keep a track of my pregnancy for looking back on as well. I don't think I'd want to miss or forget any of this period in my life (although at the moment I could do with forgetting about the nausea). I'm not stupid or naive, I know it's not all going to be rosy and it's still very early days, but hey, that's again why this blog is so important - I get to gush AND vent, unrestrained!
So to tell you a little bit more about myself, when I found out I was pregnant I had already chosen to take a year out of my English Literature course at Edinburgh University, which may seem like perfectly ironic timing. Although, it will probably work out for the best as I'm not being forced to take time that I would otherwise not have wished to take. It does mean that my absence will be prolonged, and I probably won't be returning to Edinburgh (which was never my intention anyway, as I can't stand the place) but to another university that provides adequate childcare. It is still my full intention to attain a degree, and having a baby means that yes, it will be a hell of a lot harder - but not unquestionably unattainable. I'll go back to study English, potentially with journalism studies, and consider doing a postgraduate in teaching to give me a stable career.
Aside from that, I work in a Highland Tour Company as Team Leader/Guest Relations Manager and for the most part I love my job immensely. The job itself is great, it's only the pretty crappy working conditions that let it down and during my pregnancy I think this is going to worry me quite considerably, but we'll have to cross that bridge when we come to it.
My main passion is writing, hence the studying English, and I also sing and sometimes model. I'm hoping I can pass on a little of my creative influence to our baby, as Michael is totally the opposite from me! He's a very logical and sensible thinker, whereas I am much more emotional and prone to allowing my imagination have free reign. I like to think our baby will have the best of both our personalities; I'm hoping she/he can sing and write and emote, but also have some of his/her father's common sense!
So now I should really talk about Michael, and our relationship. As I said, we've been together as an 'official' couple for two years, but we've been drifting in and out of each other's lives for near on seven... I think we always expected to end up together, and here we are - living together with a baby on the way. We did have a pretty large hiccup a few months back, in which we were both to blame, but I'm so glad we worked things out because we are now solid as a rock, and very very much in love. We've both matured a lot over the past little while and now, I'm happy about the environment our child will be raised in; even though we will be young parents, our baby will want for nothing, material or emotional. Although others may not believe it, I think we have a pretty strong foundation for our little blossoming family. Michael is studying towards a degree in Games Design and Development, which will hopefully give him the career that he deserves, and I'm very proud of what he's achieved so far.
I realise that most of this post would make me seem pretty naive, stupid even. But I'm not an unintelligent girl, I know full well that there will be a lot of hardships, sacrifices and upsets from now: during the pregnancy, when the baby arrives, and beyond. But I'm also not foolish enough to think that a baby means the end of the world because, as far as I'm aware, I'm not bearing the antichrist. People manage - we'll manage. We'll make the best of it as we always do, and although it's going to be bloody difficult, I can't wait to meet our beautiful little baby in 8 months time. Is there ever such a thing as a 'perfect time' to have a baby?
I say, bring it on.
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